Mine

I once decided to buy a dildo to spice up mine and my girlfriend’s bed play. Didn’t pay too much attention to the size, just saw positive reviews and clicked “buy now”. That’s how I ended up with a massive dildo in my mail. There’s no way it would fit her, nevermind me. But, it had a pump on it to simulate ejaculations, so it ended up being used as alcohol dispenser at our christmas party. And yes, there were more people than the two of us. It was certainly more usable than the menstrual whiskey cups that the other guy brought…