Often we dig our own grave making people “defend” their opinion. Instead of winning them over, we push them to become more and more entrenched in their opinion as they build larger mental defenses against the challenges we present. So I want to hear from you:
How do you avoid putting people on the defensive? (Even though those people had a strong alternative opinion)
What was a time where the opposite happened; all the facts were there, but absolutely no one was convinced by the talk?
I feel like solarpunk has a lot of obvious-once-seen ideas and powerful “ahh-ha” moments. But if we can’t convince others to take a glimpse from our perspective, not much benefit will come from it.
Don’t try to point out why they are wrong, but rather why you believe what you believe. And when they tell you why they believe what they do, no matter how ridiculous it might seem, respect their opinion and explain which points exactly you disagree with and why.
I think the idea of trying to convince the other is flawed in itself. It implies that you are right and they are wrong. Approach any conversation with that mindset, and neither their nor your opinion will change.
Instead, try to see a discussion as a way to exchange perspectives with the goal of finding the truth. Only if you are open to the idea of changing your mind can you hope to change that of your conversation partner.
In recent years I’ve come to this conclusion as well. For me it’s a matter of treating people the way I want to be treated — like an intelligent adult who can make their own decisions. I’m all too happy to discuss my opinions, but I’m generally not interested in persuading anyone, nor do I want to be persuaded. I am interested in information that is relevant, so that’s what I try to offer as well. If that information makes someone consider an idea they had not considered before, great! If not, that’s honestly fine, too.
In movies you can change someone’s whole worldview with a rousing 2-minute speech, but in reality I think real change takes months or years. I don’t expect to reach a consensus with someone I fundamentally disagree with in the course of a single conversation.
That said, I will admit that in my personal life this approach has its drawbacks. I have been criticized for being too passive and conflict-averse. I won’t pretend I have all problems of social dynamics figured out.
This is such an awesome answer; exactly what I was looking for. Simple, general, and something I can actually try. Thanks for replying
I find it incredibly rare that “others” are as interested in finding “truth”. Especially when they’ve been brainwashed repeatedly by their idols to ignore logic and fact with faith and opinion.