• PeePantsMcgee
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        7 months ago

        I finally stopped peeing off the porch when I killed 2 rose bushes. Now I walk 2 steps off the porch and kill the grass

      • tetris11@lemmy.ml
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        7 months ago

        I know… it’s pretty much written into marriage vows, “till death do us part or one of us stops pissing from the deck”. She needs to fulfill her duties and start joining him at night on the deck

    • Kusimulkku
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      7 months ago

      He is pissing off the deck. And no the ground won’t start smelling like piss from that lol

        • Kusimulkku
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          7 months ago

          You’d have to have quite a lot of last few drops to smell up the place. Or some ridiculously potent piss.

            • Kusimulkku
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              7 months ago

              No of course not. Please elaborate. Do they get similar amounts of users or something else that’s comparable?

              • FreakinSteve@lemmy.world
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                7 months ago

                They all have misses and drips all around them. It’s such a simple skill that men can’t master even when an entire industry was built to accommodate them.

                • Kusimulkku
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                  7 months ago

                  But you are blasting piss off the porch, the direction is away from you. Almost all of the splatter is gonna end up on the lawn, where you’re pissing anyway.

          • Pyr_Pressure@lemmy.ca
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            7 months ago

            Not if he does it every night. A few drops after a few weeks is a fair bit and wood soaks up liquid pretty good.

            • tigeruppercut@lemmy.zip
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              7 months ago

              Wood for an outside deck isn’t going to be soaking up much liquid, or the deck would turn to shit after a couple rainstorms. It’s probably pressure treated

          • RealFknNito@lemmy.world
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            7 months ago

            I’m now imagining him getting bottles of concentrated piss and pouring it off the deck in the middle of the night to deter predators.

        • tetris11@lemmy.ml
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          7 months ago

          I imagine there’s a racoon hiding underneath the boards, just lying there with its mouth open, waiting