IMPORTANT NOTE: please use a VPN whenever visiting Hextube, or anywhere else on the internet, for that matter. Protect your privacy.

For this Wednesday Super Slop Night, we’re reuniting the directors of the two Conan movies with a special double feature. First up is Red Sonja (1985), the unofficial third Conan movie, which follows the quest of Sonja (played by Brigitte Nielsen) to avenge her family by slaying an evil overlord, with the help of a magic talisman. Along the way, Conan substitute Prince Kalidor, played by Arnold Schwarzenegger, gives her a hand. One user review says this film “makes Conan the Destroyer look like Citizen Kane”, which is good enough for me. Expect a lot of stabbing and lobbed-off heads etc. Director is Richard Fleischer, who made the aforementioned Conan the Destroyer (1984), as well as Soylent Green (1973) and Fantastic Voyage (1974).

After that is Red Dawn (1984), the legendary Reaganite WW3 wet dream about a full-scale invasion of the US by the Soviet Union. A group of teens form a band of guerrilla fighters to wage war on the occupation. Despite the obvious anti-communist narrative here, some have suggested that the film is easily read as an anti-imperalist, pro-communist film. Director is John Milius, who also did Conan the Barbarian (1982); while he’s pretty chuddy, he has also voiced his respect for the bravery of the Vietcong and other left-wing resistance fighters, which arguably bleeds into the depiction here. I guess we’ll find out.

We’ll start at 8PM EST on Hextube, right here:

https://live.hexbear.net/c/movies

Be there, comrades!

Letterboxd:

• Red Sonja: https://letterboxd.com/film/red-sonja/
• Red Dawn: https://letterboxd.com/film/red-dawn/

Doesthedogdie.com links:

• Red Sonja: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0089893/parentalguide?ref_=tt_stry_pg
• Red Dawn: https://www.doesthedogdie.com/media/236923

CWs for Red Sonja:

• Implied sexual assault as part of protagonist’s backstory. However, since the movie is rated PG-13, nothing is really shown.
• Objectification of female characters.
• Nudity.
• Kissing.
• Dismemberment.
• Decapitation.
• Blood and gore.
• Someone is crushed to death.
• Cutting of flesh.

CWs for Red Dawn:

• Anti-communist propaganda.
• Death of horse.
• Someone is physically restrained.
• Implied (but not shown) sexual assault of woman by Soviet soldiers.
• Kidnapping.
• Death of parent.
• Black guy dies first.
• Blood and gore.
• Gun violence.

Links to movies:

• Red Sonja: https://tankie.tube/w/xoZCVcMgHy94eJAKX5vuCp
• Red Dawn: https://tankie.tube/w/kHpsKgfWnaYUgzQXnJCRh3