Tfw your roommate returns at 1am and leaves by 6am. Mofo you wonder why you always eat sleep for lunch, it’s because you out like the Batman. Bought yourself a whole ass bed, sleep in it 2 days a week for 5 hours at a time. Good purchase homie. Do me a favor, you out visiting your bae? Stay the fucking night.
She could use the love and I could use not having to ask myself Is That A Burglar Or Your Clown Ass, and a couple hours extra sleep without you marching down the hall like you about to execute Order 66. You picked your jank sleep schedule, not me dog.