We’re like to extend our most sincere apologies for today’s downtime, explain the issue, and talk about what we’ll be doing going forward.

Late last night or early this morning, an owl entered the server room and, unsurprisingly, pissed on everything. We had to drag them out of a corner where they’d started building a nest out of CAT5 cables. After checking with all our keyholders, we determined that they had not tricked someone into lending them the keys this time, and nobody had left a window open. We have not found their entry point yet, but we suspect we are getting closer (we’ve found a large pile of shit near one of the vents).
We managed to dry one server off and get the website running again, but unfortunately we only have 1 hair dryer and will need a few more days to dry the rest of the servers and get the site fully operational.

Going forward, our plan is:

  • Cover outside AC vents and similar in chicken wire
  • assess and reinforce weak points in the building’s structure
  • tape old CDs to the building to reflect the sun and scare them away
  • attack roosting spikes to the server racks
  • stop keeping open, uncovered cans of beans at our desks

We are also looking into hiring a falconer as a more active deterrent.

Thank you for your patience in such a difficult time.

  • goog [any]@hexbear.net
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    7 months ago

    Go on, you know you want to hit it with a jesse-wtf

    Cmon my little Discord kittens, it’s longer than two sentences. You’re not actually going to read it are you? That would take too long. It’s time for jesse-wtf

      • goog [any]@hexbear.net
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        7 months ago

        Nice Discord emote that was customized into a programmer hobbyist version of reddit. Really telegraphs how much more in touch with nature and society you are than I am. Gonna reconsider my life.

        • booty [he/him]@hexbear.net
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          7 months ago

          i wish i could be in tune with nature, i just got home from a 12 hour shift and logged on to laugh at some commie shitposts and i see you having an absolutely normal one in here. go do something with your life dude