Jokes on them, I’m in a subconscious state of gooning at all times. I am at such an advanced level I can simply close my eyes and instantly bust in my pants handsfree. I will goon at work the entire time and there’s nothing they can do to stop me since it’s all in my head.

But seriously these wet dreams need to fucking stop, I’ve had them while in bed with a partner I just nutted in a few hours before. Staying at a friends place, accidentally getting cum on their couch, and then trying to stealthily clean up in the middle of the night is not something any person should have to deal with regularly