you’re a peasant and the year is uh, fuckin 80 or something. jesus is dead but hasn’t been for all too long. you also don’t know what a jesus is.
scratch that, you’re a goblin now.
what do you do?
current status:
level 1 goblin
hp: 4/4 (8 base, -2 from worms, -2 from tired)
stealth: 3
shenanigans: 1
status: is a goblin, below average amount of worms in intestines, tired (Just ran back and forth from dennis and the castle over and over)
atk: 4.25 (3.25 base, 2 from goblin sized dagger, -1 from tired)
inventory
Sturdy Looking Stick (.25 atk)
Goblin Sized Dagger (2 Atk, Equipped)
1 Ye Flask (Flask adorned with Kanye West) which contains brimstone, salt, and coal all crushed together. It’s not a bomb.
10 ounces of saltpeter
notes
location: outside of castle
drew a weiner with poop on a castle wall. same spot you pissed on actually.
you look around. you’re in a public space in your village or hamlet or settlement or whatever.
there’s some other peasants, someone’s peeing in a ditch and someone’s swallowing an entire orange.
about 800 meters away there is a castle, though, you don’t see any obvious nobility just lounging about.
Can I roll to piss on the castle, pls?
alright, you roll a 13.
you successfully manage to jog for 5 minutes, then release your bladder onto the castle walls. nobody’s really at this part of the castle walls.
your piss does smell bad, but you have also never showered in your life, so, to you it doesn’t smell like much of anything.
Hehehe
.
I introduce myself to @Dolores@hexbear.net and ask about the zinc rock
you introduce yourself to yourself and ask yourself about the zinc rock.
it didn’t taste great or anything. kinda like mud. but it made you feel slightly better.