CW: SA, pedophelia, necrophelia.

So if this is too dark, feel free to delete my post. I know that it’s pretty fucked up.

So about 10 or 12 years ago someone showed me a really old clip of a stand-up comedian who managed to deliver the most horrible, soul-crushing insults without swearing. It couldnt have been newer than the 1990s. I managed to memorize the essence of the bit, because it was so striking. It went like this:

‘What in the name of the legalized paedophilia of braindead children is that? That is so pretending your girlfriend’s vagina is a dead man’s eye socket so you can come. You, my friend, are the guilty orgasm of a rape victim.’

Sorry. I know it’s incredibly dark. I apologize if I upset anyone. Again, feel free to remove my post. I’ll delete it myself if people are really upset. I just really want to find this clip.

Thanks in advance.

  • MagicShel@programming.dev
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    2 months ago

    Based on age of the clip the only person I can think of is Sam Kinison, who was a shock comedian with a habit of punctuating some of his remarks by yelling “Ohh! Ooohhhhh!” You’ll know it was him by that if it was him. I can kinda hear that line in his voice, but I don’t recognize it.

    • Maerman@lemmy.mlOP
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      2 months ago

      I happen to be familiar with Sam Kinison, and it was definitely not him. This guy was skinnier. Thanks for your input, though.

    • Maerman@lemmy.mlOP
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      2 months ago

      Yeah. I apologize. It just stuck in my brain because it is so incredibly dark. It’s like a twisted, perverse creativity, like a torturer who comes up with new ways to cause agony. I respect the depths this guy plumbed to come up with that, but it still makes me uncomfortable.

        • Maerman@lemmy.mlOP
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          2 months ago

          Thank you for the validation. I feel pretty insecure about posting it, to be honest. I don’t want to trigger anyone’s PTSD or something horrible like that. That’s why I added the content warning and all that.

          • chemical_cutthroat@lemmy.world
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            2 months ago

            Yeah, don’t sweat it. I wouldn’t have read it if I didn’t think I could take it, and if I couldn’t, it would be my own fault for ignoring your warning. I read a lot of dark shit, and this ranks up there. I have no idea who said it. One of the guys I work with said it sounds like old Jimmy Carr, but he never got quite that dark, I don’t think.

            • Maerman@lemmy.mlOP
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              2 months ago

              Yeah, this comedian was definitely American. But thank you for not judging me too harshly.

  • Thassodar
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    2 months ago

    Honestly it sounds like a Dave Attell joke.

    • Maerman@lemmy.mlOP
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      2 months ago

      Thanks for the reply, but I don’t think it’s him. I looked up his stuff, and he doesn’t quite fit the bill. I think the guy I saw had a mustache with no beard, possibly reddish.

      • Thassodar
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        2 months ago

        Ah he has a similar joke that goes:

        "There’s a guy, let’s call him me, he’s fucking the left eye of a pumpkin.

        ‘If he didn’t want it why was he smiling at me?’"