I attended a career fair 2 weeks ago. A list of companies that were attending the fair had been published before the event, and there was one I was extremely interested in. It’s a Water/Wastewater Treatment company. I have been working on a research project on water treatment for the past 1.5 years, I have well regarded engineering degree (although not in Civil/Env); I felt really qualified to work for this company. i had a tailor made resume just for this one company.

I enter this career fair and it’s packed with people and booths. I’m looking for this company’s booth. not paying much attention, as I’m walking ahead I hear someone from behind one booth say something I think was rude about me. I keep walking thinking not much of it. As I fail to find this company I turn back, and sure enough it’s the same booth I had thought said something about me. It’s relatively empty.

Whatever, I power through and do my best to charm them. They seem to be very polite, at least on the surface. There’s no doubt that in terms of passion and ability, I’m a good fit for them. As I finish my conversation with them, and I as I leave the booth, I sweat I hear something racist said about me.

I’m like, whatever, ‘figures’, I keep talking to other companies. Then I get a call from them about a pre interview. I take the pre-interview with HR, and give them zero reason to not be interested in me. They tell me they’re going to call me for an formal interview.

A week goes by, and I email them. Nothing. I call them the very ‘nice’ lady who I swear said something racist about me, she says ‘oh, we’re going over qualified candidates, you being one of them, and will call you soon when we’ve finalized everything’

I get a call 3 minutes later from the HR lady asking me for an interview. Yesterday, the day before the interview, she emailed me to confirm my attendance.

I have recieved a single paycheck in over 1.5 years. I’m absolutely qualified for this job, but I’ve gone through this song and dance so many times in the past 1.5 years.

Am I getting self sabotaging myself? Like, they’ve decided to interview me, they’ve been polite to my face, have engaged in conversation with me, acknowledged I’m very much qualified, but I’m just getting bad vibes (tbh, as I usually tend to get). Am I wrong?

Should I actually try or should I just whip my dick out on a hunch that they’re assholes?