For years now, I’ve been watching most of the trick-or-treaters go to the house on one side of me, take one look at my house and walk right past it, and then go to the house on the other side.
I had no clue why. Maybe they were scared of my house or thought I’d give cheap candy (my house is a bit of a fixer-upper)? I completed my “curb appeal” projects; didn’t help.
Maybe they thought nobody was home? I not only have the porch light on, but also have the living room TV on, clearly visible through the (open!) front window, and it makes no difference.
Maybe they think I’m not participating (despite the clear signal of the porch light and jack-o’-lantern)? I put up a bunch of Halloween decorations this year, and it still didn’t help!
Well, I finally found out the reason, after hearing one kid scouting ahead yelling to tell his friends to skip my house: “there’s no bowl on the porch!”
…You’ve got to be fucking kidding me.
Yep, unlike my neighbors, who had apparently just left unattended bowls of candy on their porches, I was actually sitting there inside the house, with the bowl of candy, waiting for kids to knock or ring the doorbell before I opened the door and handed it out. You know, like how trick-or-treating is supposed to work.
This is ridiculous. Kids these days are skipping viable houses with candy because they can’t be bothered to actually knock on the damn door and say “trick or treat” to the person who answers? Residents are expected to be too lazy to answer the door, and just put out the candy without even receiving the traditional threat first? With no actual interaction with the neighbors for the kids to show off their costumes, what’s even the point‽
I finally stuck a sign on the door saying “yes, you have to knock or ring for candy!” and that helped, but even then, some kids are still skipping my house because they apparently can’t be bothered to read the sign.
You get between 5-730 in a lot of neighborhoods to do trick or treating. It’s a school night. I’m not spending a cumulative extra 30 minutes of my time watching my kid stand by the door so your old ass can slide off the couch and mosey over to the door and slowly talk to my kids individually about their costumes. And by some weird extension try to make small talk with me or a parent.
If your lonely, go to a bar. I’m trying to run these street with my kids and make some real candy profit.
Just put the fries in the bag, dude.
EDIT : Downvote me all you want. You’re the ones sitting inside instead of putting out a table in your driveway like every other house next to you. Social holidays evolve naturally and this is one of those times. Trunk or treating and drive way exhibitions is the new Halloween.
If you just want a bunch of candy, go to Walmart.
Okay. Or…my kids are walking around with a gaggle of neighbors and we are all socializing. And then we have to go “that one guys house” where we sit and watch as he wastes 10 minutes while we’re 2 miles deep into a neighborhood. And kids have finite energy.
Ohhhh nOOO ten minutes???
Just drop your poor kid off with one of his friends and stay home yourself, you sound like you ruin everyone’s good time all the time.
But if you don’t get the amount of candy you want in the end (and even with a slow pace my kids have always had more candy than they could ever finish), just buy some more. Who cares about the excess of candy?
Oh, don’t you worry your sweet little head, we will.
Damn dude, doesn’t even go till his kids say they’re cold. Why get a late bedtime on a holiday?
Growing up we always stayed out extra late on Halloween, even as a young child. An im not that old either.
My kids are younger. I’ve been doing this long enough to know which houses are going to spend time on each kid. Which is fine…except my kids and the neighbor kids I was walking through our neighborhood did have time for that.