Figured would toss these on here as I’m both lazy and a disaster, but here you go (these are ancient history fwiw, when I was 9). Shouldn’t have any triggering/sad shit (didn’t screenshot, basically) but may as well share 9 year old me’s glorious basedness:

  • ReadFanon [any, any]@hexbear.netEnglish
    24·
    1 day ago

    "Oi let me give you some facts about pandas, kid - no complaining and don’t make me pull out my rubber knife on you like last time.

    We’re gonna learn about the recent evolution of the panda’s pseudo-opposable digit thumb today…"

    I’m just imagining an irrepressible thug of a grade schooler who pounces on other students when they are away from other people to mug them of their time and attention while giving them panda facts and threatening to pull out their “knife” if the other kid isn’t compliant.

    This is just a joke obviously but now it is headcanon for me.

    • SadArtemis [she/her]@hexbear.netOPEnglish
      20·
      1 day ago

      Awesome :D I wish I was that cool, I was just really always excited when they came up. And I brought my stuffed panda around with me everywhere then (regrettably the friend did not live till adulthood or for much longer, “died” sometime between the two documents this is involved in- family was a fuck).

      I was absolutely a irrepressible thug (in a “do not poke goblin” sense, not a bully/etc sense) of a grade schooler, though.