I have a theory about this place. I have noticed a theme of owls. Several users are named after owls or have owls in their profile pictures. But why? Why would a site named after bears use so much owl iconography?
Let’s think about owls. People like owls, they’re cute and fluffy. They look like cats. They’re wise. But they are also sneaky, silent predators. They operate under the cover of darkness and swoop down on their unsuspecting prey before they even know what hit them.
Believe it or not, this makes owls the perfect symbol for a tankie instance. I think that’s why these people like them. Think about it. They pretend to be nice and friendly to get LGBTQI+ people to let their guard down, and then, like a scheming owl, strike them with Marxist brainwashing.
Leftists are like owls in the way that they pretend to offer something comforting and friendly, but they are secret predators ready to take what is yours. Do not trust them. I don’t have any evidence of Hexbear doing anything bigoted, but it’s only a matter of time. The owls are hiding something.
thesis:
antithesis:
synthesis:
The dialectic
Can we teach @Dirt_Owl@hexbear.net to the magic of Wild Shape?
Day 1095 of trying to will myself into the shape of an owlbear
got a really strong feeling about day 1975, keep it up!
Druids can’t wild shape into owlbears because they’re not considered natural beasts. 
(It’s a silly rule that even the fucking movie ignores)
noooo maybe if I druid hard enough I’ll get there one day 
It’s completely true. That’s why the greatest work of insidious LGBT+ propaganda in human history is literally named “The Owl House”. We’re hiding in plain sight, waiting to ambush unsuspecting cis straight people into wearing plaid shirts and doc martens with our freaky sex-magic shenanigans. Or in the case of our ace comrades, our freaky non-sex-magic shenanigans.
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I cast Garlic Bread!
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I have a thing for marginalized people. They’re so creamy and delicious and my doctor said i had to cut down on butter they’re almost as good
Marginalized people when butterized people walk into the room:
Salty and buttery
I applaud your humanitarian efforts.
Let’s think about owls. People like owls, they’re cute and fluffy. They look like cats.
So what you are trying to say is that we shouldn’t have outdoor owls?
OP sounds like a certain funguy
Nah, the style’s off, not enough maoist standard english.
Gotta start off slow at the top of the hill or else you lose control too fast.
we have owls like in harry potter because we actually love j.k. rowling
hexwig
post hogwarts
Don’t listen to her. Go see a downstairs doctor.
Good opportunity to enjoy that i’m finally seeing my downstairs doctor less than two weeks from now to discuss how i can become post hog.
hell yeah girl, congratulations!It’s gonna be a while until i get the whole in my pants situation sorted out, there’s still one extra layer of gatekeeping and then at least a year on a waiting list ahead of me, but it still feels so good to have made it this far.
gatekeeping
bastards.thankfully there hasn’t been a barrier built that can stop the glorious march of our trans comrades
i hope it passes in a flash!
Having to mod in character customisation to fix being stuck with whatever RNG attributes rolled at start really brings the game down. No wonder reviews gave it the worst score possible, 8/10.
you take that back
Oh fuck it all makes sense now.
tankie
reactionary thought terminating cliche.
PS: Don’t care if it’s a bit, there’s no tone indicator. Poe’s law. Schrodinger’s joke.
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The owls are not what they seem.
What if the owls know something we don’t?
Owls aren’t predators, they only kill creatures who God has fated to die, they’re scavengers
I was wondering why lightning strikes every time an owl catches it’s prey
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I really only care about Stalin.
And Donald Trump. Mao, maybe, but that’s it.
Statistically speaking you can safely extrapolate my opinion out for any and all hexbear users - I’m sure they would agree that I quite literally “speak for them”.
