Well, sometimes my oldest calls me Mom, just accidentally/out of habit, and it doesn’t feel any better than Dad. So I don’t think my dysphoria requires Mom, and it’ll be easier for the kiddos as they won’t have to adapt. We’ve been trying to chip at the gender norms and see what fits and what doesn’t, as the wife and I are working this out. She/her/husband/dad might be where we end up so everyone can feel comfortable about where we are as a family.
When I was a kid my first puppy love crush was on a Sunday school teacher named Amber. And the name stuck with me. I met a second Amber in highschool and she was pure gender envy. I’ve used it online for my “pretend I’m a girl online” name many times, and if I had daughters instead of sons there’s a possibility one of them would have ended up with the name. But a couple people have started calling me Amber to my face and it’s the best thing ever.