So she’s kind of been reluctant in people knowing where she lives. And from my understanding you can just leave if you want but when it comes to her house. And since yeah it’s her house I do wonder where the boundary lays. So I am an adult yes and my mom is out right now with my sister taking care of me and staying around the house which has me worried but she said she would be back either Sunday or Monday and I’m planning on taking my chances Sunday. But seriously what is the rules as it comes down to there are cameras my sister has access to so I think she might see me leaving anyway and question me on this. So what exactly are my rights as an adult? Can someone pick me up in the driveway and we just leave together and then come back home? I do think even if I leave and come back home that can show some form of trust and then I can eventually tell my mom what I did when she gets back home. I even hope I can use my recent birthday as an excuse to start dating. But the main point I want to bring up is if I can tell someone where I live and have them pick me up outside the house?

  • TWeaK
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    1 month ago

    Edit: The below is true for (most states in) the US, which I have assumed OP is from based on the use of “mom” and “OWI”. The downvoters are ignorant.

    If you’re an adult then legally you’re a tenant, and you have all the rights of a tenant living with a landlord. Given that you almost certainly don’t have a written contract, there aren’t really any additional terms she can impose that go beyond a standard tenancy agreement.

    To be clear, most jurisdictions treat a tenant living with a landlord slightly different to a tenant living privately in a separate property. So if you want to look up your rights for where you live you need to make sure it’s for that kind of cohabiting situation.

    However, your mom can’t just kick you out, legally. She has to formally evict you using the same process any other landlord would evict their tenant. If she did kick you out or change the locks, you would be within your rights to call the police and have them mediate to grant access to your home.

    As a tenant, you are allowed to have guests over. Not just waiting outside or on the driveway to pick you up, but inside and maybe even occasional overnight stays. Although again this may be where living with the landlord makes it slightly different.

    All of this is underscored by the non-legal parts - your relationship with your mother and your continued tenancy. She can evict you, and if you fall out then she may well do that. Just because the law is on your side doesn’t necessarily mean your mom will want or have to maintain a relationship with you. A balanced position might be to assert your rights while trying not to be a dick about it and offering a fair compromise with your mom. I would say meeting your boyfriend in your driveway is a reasonable compromise, however she might not see it that way.

      • TWeaK
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        1 month ago

        Sure, but absent any specifics from OP I’ve taken the fact that they said “mom” to point to them being in the US.

        Obviously, the exact law depends on the jurisdiction, but saying “mom” at the very least rules out several places where this isn’t the case. OP also mentioned an “OWI”, which is an American legal term.