Title.

In my experience there is a great deal of overlap between the polyamory community and a lot of our communities, so I’m sure we have at least some Hexbears that are interested. Also in my experience most polyamory communites online are full of cis straight white people trying to find out how they can find a cis queer woman to use as a toy…knowing full well that is NOT what any polyamorous Hexbears would be interested in discussing, I think this community could add a lot of value to the fediverse by being a different voice than the typical heteronormative polaymory communites, and help drive traffic to Hexbear and to the fediverse on the whole among people who are looking for a geninuely safe space to discuss polyamory. There aren’t many, at least not that I’m aware of. All of the healthy polyamory communites I know of are offline, it would be nice to try to foster a healthy and safe one online too.

I’d be willing to mod it unless someone more experienced would like to volunteer, in which case please volunteer, and maybe teach me the ropes, or just take the project on yourself if you don’t think I should be a part of it.

Anyway, open to feedback on this, maybe Hexbear is a bad place for it, maybe most Hexbears are monogamous and so nobody really would get value out of it, or maybe lots of people have been wishing we had this.

  • AcidSmiley [she/her]@hexbear.netEnglish
    17·
    7 months ago

    I used to be all like “polyamory just means i have unrequited crushes on 5 different people at the same time”, but now it’s “my FWB and me reliably crush on the same people, but both of us are too socially awkward to ask any of them out, which is probably better for them because both of us are total disaster lesbians anyway” emilie-shrug

    so yeah, we probably need a poly comm to share more stories like that (i know it’s not actually a story and more like an overcomplicated bonmot or a tweet that wasn’t sent to twitter because fuck that hellsite)

    otoh idk how many of the poly users on here are actually cishet, it’s possible that 90% of the expected 2-3 polamory posts per month would neatly fit in the queer megathread

    • Infamousblt [any]@hexbear.netOPEnglish
      13·
      7 months ago

      Yes, this is exactly the kind of thing I’m lookin for, a place to share fun stories about stuff like that, share memes, etc. Also just like, a support group for “hey I have these 3 relationships and these 2 people don’t like each other but these other 2 people do and I’m having a party next week how do I manage this help” because there’s just like, no good space to post that kind of thing without monogamous folks going “WOAH ARE YOU CHEATING” and cishet poly gross folks going “JUST BONE ALL OF THEM.” I have a space in the real world that is queer polyam people only and it’s so so validating and healthy and I want to try to bring some of that here too.

      But yeah I’m sure a lot of it could also fit in the queer comm. But maybe not everyone in the queer comm wants to see it or participate in it; I know I’ve had polyam stuff I considered posting there but chose not to because I just don’t want to make someone feel uncomfortable if it’s not something they understand or relato to.

  • aaro [they/them]@hexbear.netEnglish
    16·
    7 months ago

    Here are the existing options:

    https://lemmyverse.net/communities?query=polyam

    !nonmonogamy@lemmy.world is obviously out, !polyamory@feddit.de probably isnt leftist, and !polyamory_alberta@lemmy.ca might be regional and also probably isn’t leftist. !relationshipanarchy@slrpnk.net and !polyamory@lemmygrad.ml both seem dead. Hexbear’s intentional comm creation method seems to avoid dead comms better than just letting users make their own comm whenever. On paper a decent idea? There’s obv the adult stuff that might get wrapped up in that so it’d require care, so maybe that’s something to watch, but seems like a decent idea?

    e: we’re explicitly blocked on slrpnk.net che-laugh

    e2: we’re also explicitly blocked on all of lemmy.world, lemmy.ca, and feddit.de - seems kinda not great 😬

    • Infamousblt [any]@hexbear.netOPEnglish
      10·
      7 months ago

      Thanks. Good to see there really aren’t any existing options on the fediverse that would be safe for the kind of community that Hexbear works hard to foster.

  • Infamousblt [any]@hexbear.netOPEnglish
    16·
    7 months ago

    I would like to thank literally everyone who has already posted an incorrect and/or harmful comment about polyamory in this thread, absolutely proving my point that it would be good to have a healthy and safe space for people to talk about polyamory and to push back against the garbage pop culture understanding of polyamory

  • CARCOSA [they/them]@hexbear.netEnglish
    11·
    7 months ago

    If you are willing to mod the community, could you fill out a short mod questionnaire via hexbear DM or matrix DM.

    Application

    What is your Hexbear username?

    Do you have any preferred pronouns?

    What are your thoughts on capitalism?

    What are your thoughts on imperialism?

    What are your thoughts on trans rights?

    What are your thoughts on racial justice?

    What do think about current and previous protests around the world?

    What are your thoughts on Veganism and Animal Liberation?

    Do you have any experience with other leftist online communities? What did those experiences teach you?

    What is your approach to moderation, and how do you work with teams?

    How do you deal with online drama and people who try to start things for the sake of it?

    What current comms would you be interested in moderating? Do you have any ideas for community engagement?

    What is your general time availability? (Time zone, amounts, common browsing times, etc)

    Element information

    Element is a messaging app that lets you talk to people over the Matrix protocol.

    To get started, check out this link, where you can choose to either download Element for your platform or, if on a computer, open it in a browser (“Launch Element Web”).

    The instructions that follow are for the desktop application and the web application, but the process is similar on all apps:

    Press “Create Account” We host our own Matrix server, so if you want you can change matrix.org to chapo.chat. This is completely optional; users who sign up with a matrix.org username can still talk to people with chapo.chat username. (Note: It is chapo.chat, not hexbear.net. Also, registrations aren’t always open on chapo.chat; if they’re not, just create an account on matrix.org) Fill in a username and password Hit register, and you’re done!