I feel like I remember seeing this comic (or one like it) back in my earliest days on Reddit. It must be pretty old at this point. Not complaining, just remarking; I do actually find it pretty funny

Fun fact: All tetrapods are technically fish. Tetrapods are animals with four legs. Or two arms and two legs. If you get my drift.

There’s the joke where God creates man and an angel berates him by saying “No, what you’ve done there is taken a perfectly good monkey and given it anxiety.” … but it’s worse than that.

We’re all fish. Most land fauna, including humans, are horribly mutated fish. Fish mutated enough to survive on land. This comic isn’t a comic. It’s the horrible, horrible truth.

And in writing this I realised that a great prophet had said all this before me (though if he were alive today, he might have said “personal computing devices” instead of “digital watches”):

“And lots of the people were mean, and most of them were miserable, even the ones with digital watches. Many were increasingly of the opinion that they’d all made a big mistake in coming down from the trees in the first place. And some said that even the trees had been a bad move, and that no one should ever have left the oceans.” ­­— Douglas Adams, The Hitch-hiker’s Guide to the Galaxy

This fish is my spirit animal

I feel seen and attacked

Give a man a fish and he’ll eat for a day. Slap a man upside the head with a salmon and he’ll stop asking you for fish all the goddamn time.