• LemmyLefty@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    33
    ·
    1 year ago

    Probably because you crossed the line from “dark” to “cruel”.

    Without speaking to him in years, and especially about that mutual friend, you have no idea how he’s viewed that loss, or has other, more recent losses that are similar.

    And you kept pushing it when he didn’t laugh, either deliberately or inadvertently using the social convention of not causing a scene/confronting someone over a joke to your advantage.

    • sock@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      29
      ·
      1 year ago

      mfs be like “i like dark humor aha remember our good pal we used to hangout with and love that unexpectedly hung himself aha i bet hes still hanging around… why arent you laughing… hanging in there? guys?”

      • PsychoNewt@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        5
        arrow-down
        9
        ·
        1 year ago

        He was more than a good pal to me… wasn’t to the guy I was talking to. I was honoring my deceased friend who had the absolute best sense of humor, Often dark.

        • TimewornTraveler
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          12
          ·
          1 year ago

          I wonder if maybe his dark sense of humor wasn’t that great… given what he did to himself. You gotta talk about stuff, not just leak it out in jokes.

    • PsychoNewt@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      3
      ·
      1 year ago

      Thanks for the insight. Truth is I still struggle with his passing. He had a great sense of humor and we knew we could make the most dark/twisted jokes and comments to one another. I kept thinking about him when I was dropping the subtle hanging comments to this other dude. I saw it as honoring what i loved best about the deceased but maybe I’m just having a hard time coping. Thanks again.

      • LemmyLefty@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        7
        ·
        1 year ago

        I can understand wanting to honor your friend, but by making his death the butt of the joke that’s a lot more collateral damage than you intended.

        It might work out better if you make dark jokes that aren’t pointed AT your friend but are directed outward, with a “he’d like that” tacked on. That way, it highlights something you liked about him without hitting other people.

        • PsychoNewt@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          2
          ·
          1 year ago

          I get it. Again, thanks for taking the time to helping me to see a different perspective. I swear my social awkwardness (and lack of general awareness) will be the death of me.