- cross-posted to:
- neurodiversity@lemmygrad.ml
- cross-posted to:
- neurodiversity@lemmygrad.ml
As an AuDHD person, the college dropout story is relatable to me, except for the YouTube career success. I grew up in a madhouse during my traumatic childhood, and going to college free from my backwards, overprotective, overly strict parents was essentially like falling off a cliff. I was already burnt out during my last year of high school, and I was too excited with the freedom and ended up wasting time playing video games and skipping classes regularily because I had little energy to function as an adult. I still struggle with burnout to this day due to being an overworked IT contractor for years.
Step one is to drink an energy drink and to see if it calms you down or hypes you up. Calm is likely adhd. If not then it will take a proper equation. Several other issues can cause similar executive disfunction and ruling out ADD vs Minor depression is sprisingly hard.
i don’t really notice much from energy drinks. but i take caffeine pills if i got very little sleep and i guess that helps
i’m diagnosed with clinical/major depression from when i was 15. still there i guess but not as bad now? i used to be on meds but i feel like they didn’t do shit but make me an emotionless robot
what makes me think i might have adhd as well:
even pre-depression i’d procrastinate bad, i’m terrible at starting tasks i don’t want to do. from a very young age i’ve been awful at doing homework despite doing very good in school otherwise, for most of elementary school i didn’t even brush my teeth
bad at paying attention to things that don’t interest me, fixate too much time on specific things e.g. an internet rabbithole
impulsiveness; music is very important to me and i’ve gotten mild tinnitus at 19 from blasting headphones and yet i still turn the volume way too high when i’m feeling it. easily addicted to social media and video games too
forgetful and misplace stuff. sometimes i’ll like, think of something i want to look up and then forget 10 seconds later because my mind wandered elsewhere and then i have to think of a cue to remember what it was. before going out i think to myself a dozen times if i have everything
fidgety. hyperactive from early childhood, always climbing shit and tripping lmao
perfectionism
often creating made up scenarios in my head
brain fog and very bad at being on time
difficulty making decisions. a month ago i literally spent 3 days taking hours researching a new pair of shoes to buy in between watching anime or scrolling on tiktok, because i told myself i couldn’t do anything else productive or even go for a walk until i got the task of picking a shoe out of the way
i lowkey pace back and forth and talk fast to myself when i’m alone. have a hard time just sitting still
sorry if this is long, not sure how much of these are genuine symptoms just things that seem ND that i experience. btw my dad is diagnosed with it
Just a general word: ADHD is a dimensional disorder. Meaning, there isn’t a single identifying symptom that differentiates ADHD from say, a more neurotypical person that is a bit disorganised. Everyone forgets shit, everyone is late once in a while and everyone fidgets when they are nervous.
So the question you have to ask yourself (and which will be part of the diagnosis): How often does that happen? Is this majorly impacting the direction your life is going and are you okay with it?
If the answers are “pretty much everyday” and “I would not be where I am, if I didn’t behave like that and I feel like I can’t do anything about it even though I want to”, you have a pretty good indication.
Your wording and descriptions all sound very much like my (inattentive) ADHD to me.
Excellent comment!