• MermaidsGarden@lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    Are people still talking about JD Vance having sex with a couch? We need to put to bed the idea of JD Vance having sex with a couch. It’s not appropriate for people to think of Vice Presidential candidate JD Vance having sex with a couch. JD Vance has gone on record to deny that he has had bare skin contact with a couch within the last 5 years. It’s absurd that JD Vance was banned from a Cleveland area IKEA after making sweet, passionate love to a KIVIK Sofa Chaise.

    Once again, there is no evidence of JD Vance having sex with a couch. You need to stop calling JD Vance a couchfucker.

    • evidences@lemmy.world
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      3 months ago

      Pssst just a heads up there’s no Cleveland area IKEA, there are however an Ikea in both the Columbus and Cincinnati areas.

      • jballs@sh.itjust.works
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        3 months ago

        They probably had to close the IKEA in Cleveland after homie fucked a couch in it. That’s the type of situation that will ruin a business.

      • Th3D3k0y@lemmy.world
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        3 months ago

        Is all Appalachian… right? Like Middletown, middle of Appalachian town… Dude’s an idiot

    • photonic_sorcerer@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      3 months ago

      I have no idea how one can avoid having bare skin contact with a couch for five years. Unless you always wear long sleeve shirts, socks and long pants and be very careful about where you put your hands.