How insecure can you be? Everyone was ordering beers but I didn’t feel like drinken, so I ordered tea. I guess my masculinity is in shambles right now.

Guys, drink whatever you want.

    • DankZedong @lemmygrad.mlOP
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      34
      ·
      edit-2
      1 year ago

      For real. I’m 6’2 and work out 4 times a week. Even then some guys think you’re not men enough if you don’t tick all their silly boxes.ust be a miserable life.

      Edit: not that I think those measurements are manly either. The only qualification for being manly is identifying as one.

      • all star [he/him]@lemmygrad.ml
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        19
        ·
        edit-2
        1 year ago

        Stuff like what you’ve posted about others expectations and their arbitrary boxes really exemplifies how people use gender roles to seek some sort of self validation. It’s funny how if you ask someone who cares deeply about their male identity what being a “man” is, it always conveniently aligns exactly with themselves, no need for self adjustment

    • chemicalprophet
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      12
      arrow-down
      3
      ·
      1 year ago

      Real men people forge their own path, never caring what those around them think.

      “Ok, one mint tea please”

      No not like that

      FTFY

      • all star [he/him]@lemmygrad.ml
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        18
        ·
        1 year ago

        Sure, sorry if the tone wasn’t clear on my original post, it was made mocking people who think like that, people like the ones laughing at the tea in the first place. I personally have no interest in prescriptive gender or personhood definitions

        • ImOnADiet@lemmygrad.ml
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          8
          ·
          1 year ago

          probably could just make it clearer like this:

          Reactionary: Real men forge their own path, never caring what those around them think.

          Me: Ok, one mint tea please

          Reactionary:: No not like that

      • Calavera
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        11
        arrow-down
        1
        ·
        1 year ago

        I think you broke it rather than fixed it

  • Munrock ☭@lemmygrad.ml
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    42
    arrow-down
    3
    ·
    1 year ago

    Just do what xi Jinping did at the Two Sessions, and order a second cup.

    According to Highly Credible Western Analysts™, that’s a power move.

  • DamarcusArt@lemmygrad.ml
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    29
    ·
    1 year ago

    This has always been the weirdest part of this kind of toxic masculinity. Being “tough enough” to not just go along with the crowd makes you a wimpy soyboy? Real men blindly do what everyone else is doing I guess.

  • Dr. Wesker@lemmy.sdf.org
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    24
    ·
    1 year ago

    If you ever just want to skip a potential interaction, tell them you’re the designated driver. You also might get your nonalcoholic beverage of choice on the house.

  • ImOnADiet@lemmygrad.ml
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    17
    ·
    1 year ago

    it’s literally the dorkiest shit ever lol, like what the fuck is the point of drinking “manly” alcoholic drinks like beer and then sneering at like a “girly” cocktail, like come on I only need to drink like 2 or 3 of these to actually have fun while you either have to sit there drinking forever or chug your dogshit beer…

  • Red Wizard 🪄@lemmygrad.ml
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    14
    ·
    1 year ago

    Listen, I like beer, sour beer, hoppy beer, Belgian style beer, but at this point in my life I can’t drink any of it without feeling like shit afterwards. You’ll catch me ordering a Sex On The Beach, or any other sweet drink instead. That’s if I’m even in the mood to drink, which I’m usually not.

    If you ask me it takes more balls to order a “girly” drink then it does to order a bud light.

  • CriticalResist8@lemmygrad.ml
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    14
    arrow-down
    1
    ·
    1 year ago

    Make your own mint teas instead. Grow your own mint (it grows very easily and will overtake your garden if you don’t pot it), add 1 part mint leaves 1 part green tea to a teapot, boiling water, steep 2-3 minutes, and you have Moroccan mint tea. Normally you should also drown it in sugar but I prefer my tea without any sugar.

    It’s weird what we consider to be “manly”. Mint tea is a favourite in Morocco and the rest of North Africa and they had the Berber raiders and Hannibal.

      • CriticalResist8@lemmygrad.ml
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        6
        ·
        1 year ago

        I was wrong on the proportions, from what I remember it’s the usual amount of green tea (1 teaspoon per cup) and then just kinda fill the rest of the steeper with mint. I have a teapot with a bigger steeper to make 1l at a time, it’s not an exact science lol. I also used to make it with just mint and it gives it more bite

      • Addfwyn@lemmygrad.ml
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        2
        arrow-down
        1
        ·
        1 year ago

        I work in hospitality, and we actually get guests who bring their own tea leaves sometimes to our restaurants. For liability reasons we won’t brew it for them, but we will provide them hot water and a teapot to do themselves if they want. Not sure anyone has brought in mint, but I imagine we would let them.

    • Life2Space@lemmygrad.ml
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      6
      ·
      edit-2
      1 year ago

      The idea of brewing your own tea (or any food) with ingredients that you’ve grown yourself is just really cool to me, for some reason.

      • CriticalResist8@lemmygrad.ml
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        4
        ·
        edit-2
        1 year ago

        well the tea leaves might be a bit more difficult to get since tea bushes need a very specific climate to grow*

        But personally having done it with mint, it’s not cottagecore vibes in my case lol. I could get mint at the store and it would be most of the same (although I think I have Moroccan mint which is the best one imo and I can’t always get it fresh at the store), it’s just that growing it I always have leaves for my needs without needing a trip to the store, at least when it’s in season lol

        Think I’m gonna go make mint ice tea now though 🤔

      • Addfwyn@lemmygrad.ml
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        2
        arrow-down
        1
        ·
        1 year ago

        Not growing the entirety of my own food, but I do grow most all of my own herbs for cooking. Most herbs are pretty easy to grow and it’s nice to know I will always have some (very) fresh herbs on hand.

        Includes some mint that does quite often get used for tea.

        Give it a try. Mint is really easy. Basil is also easy, and technically related to mint anyway. Even if you don’t have much space, you can do those on an apartment balcony still. Bonus, mint naturally keeps away some types of insects that we normally consider pests.

      • redtea@lemmygrad.ml
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        12
        ·
        1 year ago

        I order whatever drink I want, too, including non alcoholic drinks like tea. Sometimes a hot chocolate. One thing that pisses me right off is having to wait for it. I’m patient. So I don’t mind waiting for it. But when I’m left waiting because I’ve ordered a non-alcoholic not-Diet Coke … 😡. It happens all the time. People who order after me will take priority if they order an alcoholic drink. Sometimes I’ve seen the barkeep actively look for someone else to serve rather than make my drink when I ask for it. It arrives eventually.

  • eran_morad@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    10
    ·
    1 year ago

    the fuck? mint tea is the preferred drink of millions of men living in north africa and the middle east.

    • DankZedong @lemmygrad.mlOP
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      11
      ·
      1 year ago

      Makes me think about a shampoo bottle I saw at my parents once. It was for men and it had a picture of an explosion on it. It was called ‘extreme shampoo’ and it smelled like ‘wood and fire’ or something like that. It had a nice smell which reminded me of the forest, but the bottle itself was just comical.