• people_are_cute@lemmy.sdf.org
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    1 year ago

    Probably a normal thing in the US, where families are so broken by default a simple call from a parent sounds like a disaster.

    • MuhammadJesusGaySex@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      Broken? What are you talking about? My dad started leaving me home alone for weeks at a time at age 12. By age 16 it was months at a time, and my house became the place where other kids came to hang out. I graduated college, or University. Then became a heroin addict. My family stopped talking to me because of this thing called “tough love”. Now, I’m all better and have my own family with kids and a partner, but my dad and sister wonder why I won’t let them be a part of it (my mom died when I was 8).

      You know regular all American family. Nothing weird, or dysfunctional here. Definitely not broken.

      • Querk [they/them]@discuss.tchncs.de
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        1 year ago

        Same reason people at home just come up to each other and start talking (which actually requires immediate response) even when the topic is non-urgent whatsoever, instead of leaving notes around the house.

        It’s all based on differing conventions among people, so saying a call “demands immediate response” is putting your convention above others as the only true one.

        In my family the convention is a bit different. A single call does not signal any urgency and so no one is expected nor obliged to answer if they don’t feel like it. A second call after the first one wasn’t answered implies importance. Third and more calls imply urgency and then emergency. If something is important or urgent and calls aren’t getting answered, a message is sent.

        I like my convention. I also have slightly different conventions with some friends. I am also aware different people may have different conventions and I don’t hold mine to be superior or theirs inferior.

        • JohnDClay@sh.itjust.works
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          1 year ago

          I agree your convention would supercede the one I’m taking about. I kinda like it too.

          I think conversation is different though since there is a major effort imbalance between writing a note and taking. But there is no effort imbalance in texting or calling, especially since you can voice type.

        • socsa@lemmy.ml
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          1 year ago

          I see the confusion. I don’t ever want to have a conversation with anyone.