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I mean it’s Facebook, why would anyone expect anything but diarrhea from a laxative loaded sandwich?
The desire to gag upon reading that description mirrors my sentiments toward the company.
Reading Threads made me feel like I had shit myself
What a colorful description. Love it.
That description was a trip.
advertisement for new pants pops in to your feed
Those screenshots are unreal. Did real people write those? Unironically? Screenshots from Threads is going to do for cringe what Twitter screenshots did for humor.
I got the same reaction. I guess now we know why the company is called Meta.
Have you ever been high/drunk and you walk into a CVS and the security guard is staring at you? That’s what Threads is.
This part makes me want to read more from this author.
They had me with
"Threads feels like when a local restaurant you enjoy opens a location in an airport.
It feels like a Twitter alternative you would order from Brookstone."
Perfectly captures the banal uncanny valley of it all
It is an app stuffed with verified users I’ve never heard of who have 7 million YouTube subscribers. They all do Epic Pranks and they spread Positive Vibes and they Don’t Talk Politics Here.
What a shit show. No wonder why depression disorders are skyrocketing.
That thumbnail tho
You wake up and the first thing you see is that.
Hey, you, you’re finally awake. You were trying to sign up for Thread, right?
“You have any games on your phone?”
“Just kidding, I know exactly what’s on your phone.”
He’s looking directly into my soul for personal data to harvest
Seriously, nightmare fuel right there
Lmaooooooo it made me chuckle. Like wth
Me before reading this article: “I’m never going to install or use Threads, and I’m not remotely interested in it.”
Me after reading this article: “Ok, now it has my attention, but only in the same way that seeing a multi-vehicle pileup in an ice storm does: You can’t help but wonder how many more cars are going to plow into it.”
I enjoyed the authors metaphors
They certainly painted a picture, lol
Spot on with Twitter having Berlin 1937 vibes
It reminded me of Regular Car Reviews, if you’ve ever seen that.
Not only enjoyed them but I had memories and emotions from them
I’ll think about them for the minutes to come
I ended up subscribing to their Substack account.
Only needed one sentence there to know all I need to. “Currently there is no way to only see people you follow.” Lol so more bullshit like Facebook and Instagram where you get friend, Ad, sponsored post, you might like this, group post, friend, Ad, Ad…
Just another way for Facebook to feed you non stop adverting in between tiny bites of content. We talk about how terrible Reddit is…I don’t understand how my wife uses Facebook at all.
I feel bad for people who will get sucked into this nonsense and enjoy the fediverse through an app that is basically malware come to life.
As far as I’m aware. No big youtuber has mentioned the fediverse in their posts or videos about threads. It’s either they don’t know or don’t care. Unfortunately we might need to battle threads alone
Gen z and lower don’t use the internet like millennials and above. My cousins and sister are all under 20 and use group chats, dischord, Snapchat and tiktok because they want connections with their groups of friends not strangers online.
My daughter is 15 and you’re exactly right. Demographic wise…who do guy think the target audience for threads is and how is meta going to stay in business if Gen Z uses NONE of their apps?
I think it’s like that now cause they rushed release, given Twitter’s recent issues.
As of now, there are no ads. The main feed is essentially a jumbled mess of your followers and random popular posts. They say they don’t plan to monetize until it’s more fleshed out, so we’ll see how long that takes.
It’ll happen when they capture the biggest portion of Twitter’s users. As soon as that happen enshittification shall descend upon it.
I think if somebody wants that kind of content they are well served already by Reddit, Facebook etc.
Please don’t go to Lemmy and try to turn it into that.
I’m so happy I don’t have any desire to see it.
The joy of missing out!
Honestly, the article made me morbidly curious, like passing by a particularly awful car crash.
Wow fuck that.
Madlads material right here.
Threads has committed the worst crime you can possibly commit on the internet. It’s boring.
Facebook, whilst it is full of people I know doing nothing interesting, has a place. There are many good and useful communities on there.
Instagram is handy but ultimately full of influencers who have created a lifestyle of looking cool and being paid by thirsty brands, fuck you gymshark!
Twitter is, well full of people talking crap.
Threads would appear to take the worst of all of them and mash it together. I’m tempted to install it but not yet. How long do we give it until it dies off?
Note that the data it collects is the maximum possible - every data -oriented privilege possible. And note that you can’t remove it without deleting your Instagram account.
To me, installing Threads to see what it’s like is like having unprotected sex with a crack-addict in an alley to see what it’s like: I’m not curious enough to take the risks and I’m guessing the experience isn’t that great anyways.
Much like having unprotected sex with a crack addict, it will probably leave you full of regret and probably a burning sensation in your gentlemen parts for some time.
I think I’ll give it a miss for a while.
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Eh, substack notes doesn’t feel like nearly as much of a bummer because it’s mostly a bunch of blog authors chatting with and boosting each other. Not nearly the wasteland of brands and vapid influencers threads seems to be becoming.
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I guess the various silly names different companies try to come up with for “post” or “boost” are not that big of an issue for me.
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At least it’s not Medium.
Such angst and yet no mention of Mastodon as a FOSS alternative.
Mastodon (and other FOSS ActivityPub platforms) aren’t just great because they are open source, they are great because they are distributed.
The Internet was designed to be resilient, famously designed to withstand (a nuclear) attack. The World Wide Web started to make it monolithic and Web 2.0 resulted in a more centrally controlled infrastructure.
When an attack comes from above (like Musk, /u/spez, Meta and Google) one (group of) individual(s) can take our whole swathes of content in one policy change.
Fantastic article, 10/10 read. The roasts are on-point
